faithMile

by Dean F. Mapa

Lina beams for the camera. As a backdrop slightly above her head, bold letters emblazon the word, “Congratulations!” Lina was recently graduated from her elementary education at the age of 16 years.
What’s so special about this? Lina is one of the girls at the center for street children I voluntarily work for. Born from a poor family, Lina grew up in the streets without proper nutrition and abused by adults. Because of this she is a slow thinker. She was in fact called “Dumb and Dumber” by the other street children. She couldn’t even steal properly.

Rescued by our center, she was then placed under a UNICEF-sponsored education program in one of the local schools. Lina, against all odds, inched her way from grade to grade and finally received her certificate of graduation. It was, indeed, a prized possession for her!

How did she do it and what can we learn from this former street urchin?

She didn’t allow herself to be influenced by others’ talk. Her street peers thought she couldn’t do it. She was called names. They judged her hopeless. She refused to listen and instead pressed on. She listened to her own heart, which told her she could do it.
She developed positive thought. She knew she was a slow thinker, but she didn’t waste mental energy in confirming this. Instead she sought to convince herself that education was important and the more she learned, the faster she would be able to think. She sought to train her mind.
She wasn’t afraid. She didn’t allow the environment from whence she came to instill fear in her to go to school, a totally different world from the “education” of the streets. Yes, she was apprehensive at first, but she used this as a launching pad for her determination.
She lived one day at a time. Asked teasingly what her secret was when she received her certificate, she answered: “I went to school each day.” Indeed, the graduation was a cherished goal, but to get there she had to start and finish each school day.
The resources to achieve our goals are already within us. Lina, although it can be said had nothing, now has the best thing after all: the heart to achieve. Now, watch her conquer the world!

Dean F. Mapa is a writer, motivational speaker and inspirational coach. Visit his Web site, www.be-inspired.org.

by Katryna Starks

How far should you go sexually with the one you love?

Believe it or not, God wants you to have sex with the one you love. Really. He does.

He just wants you to get married first.

I recently encountered a man who finds me attractive and likes my personality. We even share many of the same interests. That man decided not to pursue a dating relationship with me because I won’t have sex before I am married. His reasoning was clear: “I respect your beliefs, but when I fall in love, it will be forever. I hope that person will love me and respect me and choose to know everything about me. And making love is part of knowing the whole, complete person you deeply care about.”

The funny thing is, I agree with him 100%. I, too, want to find the one I’ll be with forever. And when I find him, I want to know him in all ways – including sexually. After the wedding.

It seems that in today’s society, people (including Christians) are actively avoiding marriage. For instance, Christian couples often ask the question “if you love someone, how far can you ‘go’ without sinning?” The answer is: you can go straight up the aisle.

If you’re really in love, why would you not marry? As a matter of fact, engaged couples might have the least temptation of all. Let’s say that Jim and Tasha are engaged and they will be married on February 14. No doubt, Jim and Tasha have very strong sexual feelings for each other, but they know that this sexual tension won’t last forever. As a matter of fact, it will only last until February 14. After that, they can have as much sex as they want. I don’t mean to trivialize temptation for engaged couples, but it seems that waiting would be easier if you know you won’t have to do it forever. If you leave the relationship open-ended for an extended period of time, that’s when it’s the most difficult to wait.

But let’s say that a couple isn’t ready for marriage. The two are just dating. In that case, they probably don’t fit the full criteria of “in love”. They are probably in “really strong like” with a case of lust on the side. But is that the ideal situation to have sex in? I’ve heard couple’s say things like “We love each other, but we’re not in a hurry to get married or anything.” In that case, they don’t love each other enough to have sex. By not wanting to get married, they are basically admitting that they are not sure that they are with “the one”. After all, if you found “the one” that you wanted to spend your life with, why would you balk at a commitment that signifies you sharing your life? And, if you aren’t sure enough to get married, how are you “sure” enough to have sex?

God created marriage to be a loving union that fulfills many of our needs – including sex. He knows we want sex and he doesn’t have a problem with our sexuality. It’s our lack of commitment that keeps us out of his will.

So, when you find the love of your life, go all the way – to the altar!

A while ago, a friend asked me to write a letter of recommendation so that she could qualify for a scholarship. When she asked me, I said yes, but when I looked at the paperwork, I wasn’t so sure about my decision. “I know her,” I thought, “but not well enough to answer these questions!” I was disappointed. I wanted to help her, but I suddenly realized how little I knew about her. Because the deadline was rapidly approaching, I didn’t think she could find a replacement if I backed out, so I got out a blank sheet of paper and began to “practice” writing the letter.

There were questions to guide me (like, How has the candidate overcome adversity?) and, as I answered them, I realized that I actually knew a lot about my friend.

As I thought about her roles at home and at church, I realized that she is a dynamic leader who has overcome a lot of difficulties to get where she is today. I saw her strength and her ability to laugh in a new way. By the time I finished, not only did my friend get a great letter of recommendation, but I had a new level of respect for her. Writing that letter did great things for our friendship – and she doesn’t even know.

If my level of admiration and respect for my friend increased through the act of writing her a letter of recommendation, what would happen if I wrote a letter of recommendation for my enemy?

God says that we should love our enemies and forgive those who tresspass against us. That’s not an option. It’s a direct command. Usually, people become our enemies because they’ve done something negative to us or someone we care about. How can we love someone who has done something so bad? By seeing them as God sees them: as human and whole.

Think about it. Our enemies are people, just like us. There are things that we know about them. We know some of their hardships. We know their backgrounds. We even know their insecurities. If we didn’t, then they wouldn’t have a chance of being an enemy. We wouldn’t know them well enough to dislike them.

If loving your enemies is a challenge for you, here are some simple tasks that can help you put them into perspective:

* Write down several of your enemy’s personality traits. Then, write down how those traits could help him achieve success – as if you were writing a letter of recommendation. For instance, someone who you think of as a “dictator” or “control freak” is probably organized, efficient and has a commanding presence. Great traits for a leader!

* Ask yourself if your enemy has overcome adversity to attain her present position. Think about the hardships she’s had to face – or is still facing. How would you react if you were in her position? If you were facing the same challenges, would you do any better, or would you react the same way she did?

* Sometimes it’s easier to think of someone’s good traits if we can see how they can help us. If you were forced to rely on your enemy for something, what would you want it to be? Is he punctual? Does she know how to “work a room” or talk her way out of unpleasant situations?

* What traits do you admire in your enemy that you wish you had more of? Could you use her fashion sense? His time management skills? Her financial saavy? His computer expertise?

Everyone has value – including your enemies. By writing your enemy a “letter of recommendation,” you can discover the entire person rather than focusing on one or two negative experiences. In the end, you will have more respect for your enemy … and maybe even develop a friend!